I realize I have not written anything in awhile, this is because I have been busy with 7 classes and a part time job. On top of it all, I have my health that I have to keep an eye on. It seems that one little thing can make me ill, which causes more trouble for me. This semester has been my most difficult one, and I have doubted myself quite a bit this semester as to if I can do this.
I am not one to give up, especially on something I am so passionate about doing. I am going to be transparent with you, I have struggled so much this semester. I am a honors college student who took on a big course load, who has to work in order to pay for school, and I have to keep an eye on my health. It felt like it was too much like I was drowning from life. I knew I had to change something.
I have really bad anxiety, and most of the time this has taken my focus off of what needs to be done. This happened quite a bit this semester until I had had enough. I talked to my doctor about what else I should be doing so I could be successful this semester. She gave me a few suggestions which I tried every idea out. I started exercising weekly, eating better, going to bed earlier, talking with people who understand my anxiety, and most importantly investing more in God.
I am not going to lie but this did take awhile to work. It has been almost a year since I was diagnosed with high anxiety. Today, I see myself becoming more of the type of educator I want to be. God has worked through my friends and family more than I can count this past year. God has also opened new doors for me and placed people who love and care for me in my life. All of these things have grown me in Christ and into someone, I can be proud of.
I just want to take a moment and share a couple of things that have impacted me the most this year. The first thing was changing jobs. As some of you know, I had my very first job for a little over four years and was treated awfully. Where I work now, I am appreciated, loved, and have become a part of their family. This family has been such a blessing to me, especially the young lady that I have the pleasure of working with. This young lady is seventeen-years-old and she has autism. She is nonverbal, but her silence speaks louder than the little words she does speak. God has worked through her to show me that working with people as special as her, this is what I need to do. Whether this is through teaching, ABA therapy, occupational therapy, or whatever God has in store for me.
I must admit that I have been blessed with the people who have been placed in my life. I have already met friends that I know will be lifelong. I have had professors who have encouraged me and inspired me to do more than expected. I have had a boyfriend who challenges me to be a better Christian and person daily, land a family who loves me and supports me. And lastly, I have a God who loves me unconditionally and holds my future in his hands.
I know that in the end all of what I have been through will be used for the glory of God. I also know that this will be helpful in my classroom. I will be able to see signs of students with a mental illness and understand how I can help. I want my students to understand that they can come and talk to me. I want to be able to give resources to help them so that they can improve.
Here are some resources below.